As you wish.
gunpowderandspark:

dapperhatsandfancypants:

theausterevolunteer:

oscarstardis:

stillmonkeys:

From A Series of Unfortunate Events DVD commentary track.

if you haven’t watched this film with the commentary then you are missing out, it’s hilarious. “Lemony Snicket” was completely unhappy with the film and wanted no real part of it and so in the commentary he just fucks about. Seriously, at one point he gets out an accordion and drowns out the director with his playing

"nearly all of my life"

Lemony Snicket sass is what I aspire to in life.

"Lemony Snicket" (Dan Handler) was asked if he liked the movie.
He said “I love the movie as much as someone who wrote 8 drafts of a movie before being fired from his own creation could possibly be.”
The man’s life is sarcasm and it’s beautiful.

quixon:

thebigblackwolfe:

frantzfandom:

girilla-warfare:

the-average-gatsby:

the-average-gatsby:

how do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber

ask them to pronounce “unionized”

Holy fuck thats clever

It took me 5 minutes to get this

FUCK

Oh fuck you.

Smart people jokes be like

115,887 notes · 4 hours ago

enchantedshovel:

*punches through the monitor* [hacker voice] im in

14,556 notes · 4 hours ago

witchsmoke:

tianyi:

halloween should be 1 week long

halloweek

28,264 notes · 4 hours ago

[ PASSIONATELY SINGS A SONG IN A LANGUAGE I DON’T UNDERSTAND] 

390,017 notes · 4 hours ago

kanyes-wife:

i hate looking ugly the first time i meet someone like wait i can do better than this i swear

156,364 notes · 6 hours ago

relahvant:

when i make a joke to myself and no one’s around to hear it

image

image

520,221 notes · 6 hours ago

emobaria:

have you ever seen somebody so impossibly attractive that you completely question their existence and wonder how it’s even possible to look that good

80,152 notes · 6 hours ago

created by mxrandakerr